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Subject: Santiago #30 - Illuminati(on)
(Posted on Aug 2, 2016 at 11:20AM ) Tags:
So one is out there living life in the rat race, and over time, it slowly dawns on your sorry ass that stuff in the world  really doesn’t seem to work the way they say it does. You start spending time questioning stuff, and doing a little digging, and then you incrementally shine some added light on the darker, hidden corners of the world. Not that it’s lying buried deep, but more hidden in plain sight, amidst all the background noise of distractions and events supposedly happening out there.


And you won’t see or read about any of it in the mainstream news, a topic previously covered here. This stuff is also NOT taught in school either, because they definitely don’t want folks to figure it out, as George Carlin nicely summarizes at a high level.


As set in the book, Bob’s just some single guy at a wedding in South America, but for a few moments, he was thinking about such stuff while sitting in the back of the church, being a little bored with the full-on Catholic ceremony going down.

I struggled with longer form ceremonies of any nature, unless there was something very
unusual going on. But even then, I was not looking for extreme religious experiences—like,
say, the evil Illuminati child sacrifice 
"coming-of-agepractice performed deep within the
Vatican’s bowels and in other super-secret European lairs.
The planet was filled with
crazy-ass fucked-up shit, and not enough occupants knew what was really going down.

So whaddup with all that!? 


While mentioned alone, it’s more about hierarchical layers of societies, groups, organizations, entities, and a cluster of families, all acting in concert with each other to make our world a completely, controlled, illusory experience. And the Catholic Church is a big part of it. 

Bob's always trying to look at the humorous side of things, so for the naysayers and those not yet in the know, here’s some boisterous spin our guy puts out on this topic. 
 


 
Maybe he hasn’t yet gone here for some disinformation and further muddy the waters. For an even more "out there" take on it, here's a fun shortie Bob is particularly fond of .


If you need more LOLZ along these lines of "ABC is Illuminati," then this YouTube channel has dozens more in similar vein, so knock yourself out.




Seriously though, despite Bob’s poking fun, there really is a LOT more going on in our world than meets the eye, pardon the pun. You can spin a lot of cerebral cycles looking at it, since there’s much misinformation, disinformation, and partial-truth filled controlled opposition circulating out there, and myriad related topics. It all just to keep you in the dark, and confused, because that’s exactly what is desired.

Here is a short tickler that is on point into how things really don't work as they appear. 


Nothing really is as we’re taught—think about who controls and dictates the education curriculum to begin with. And on another level altgether, think about how even “space may be the final frontier, but it’s made in a Hollywood basement,” as them there Red Hot Chili Peppers sing in Californication.


But hey, one needs to do one's own research, if trying to find out what's really going on, and know why stuff doesn’t seem to be getting better in our world of late. Maybe, cuz, like it’s been long ago designed to be that way, and driving us to some pre-determined end objective. 



But otherwise, if you're not just quite yet jonesing to dive in deep and make your head spin, tuck into Bob's debut novel instead for his entertaining, exotic escpades at weddings all over the place. It's a guaranteed, really different read. 



A couple weeks before Christmas 1996, Bob was sitting in a rather sturdy church in Santiago, Chile, and trying to distract and amuse himself with different musings and thoughts during a tedious, full-on Catholic wedding ceremony. One such thread was about his general attendance, or lack thereof, in houses of worship. 

That I needed such diversions at all reminded me why I limited my presence in
religious venues to begin with—weddings 
and funerals only. Call it WaFO. I wasn’t
even a part of the seasonal C+E crowd.
OK, maybe add the odd baptism or bar
mitzvah, 
or if there might ever be need to stave off hordes of zombies taking
over the world.

Many churches were solid enough for such a siege, but it would be paramount to
hole up in one with minimal windows 
high enough up to be inaccessible to marauding
fleshseekers. In Manhattan, the AT&T Long Lines Building was 
arguably much more
zombie-proof than most houses of worship. It also held the advantage of not being home
to a 
particular religion—unless of course spiritual suffusion itself provided protection.

Not being a regular attendee, Bob was thinking about the fortress-like state of many churches, and comparing to that other edifice mentioned above. And why not? That’s the way Bob’s brain ticks along. You never know when zombies might strike. Always good to be aware, if not prepared per se. 

Here's a frontal of the Iglesia de los Santos Ángeles Custodios from the wedding, followed by that NYC structure. 


Do zombies even really exist, apart from our fascination with them in movies and TV? Some say there is indeed a basis there, but that is for another discussion altogether. Do your own research and make your own determination.

Regarding picking a suitable spot to make a stand, the downside may well be that if they can’t get in, you may consequently not be able to get out either. It goes both ways. Long term survivability is tied to a host of other factors, once you start to think about it.  Depending on where one is, and how they are encountered, and with various means and tools haphazardly at one’s disposal, any reaction to them will vary, even if it’s Grandma, as seen in Scary Movie 4.


The lads in Shaun of the Dead make some exemplary use of old 12-inch vinyl LPs in an inspired creatve moment, in the midst of their off-the-cuff defense tactics.


Bob commends their musical choices, sacrificing some for the sake of others. Do-or-die situations call for tough decisions.

Another facet to consider, is whether the other side will be the more traditional, slow-moving ones, or the newer, more agile fast ones (a la 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later), and how you need to react.


No matter where you are, beyond being holed up somewhere (hopefully) safe and defendable, your ass will need lots of supplies (e.g., guns, ammo, food, water, and other weaponry) in order to keep up the good survival fight.

Here are two highlight reels of improvised, imaginative methods on dealing with and dispatching zombies, doubling down on a Top 10 list approach from some of the cinematic genre's finer splatterfest moments over the years.


Bob particulalry digs the chainsaw bride scene, at position #2 in the second reel, seeing as the damndest things can happen at a wedding, so best to keep ever alert. Here below is the English language trailer on that Spanish flick, [Rec]3: Génesis


Ladies, talk about being real pissed when your big day doesn’t go down the way you had it all perfectly planned. Survival (and marriage) is all about pivoting and adapting.


Now that’s spicing a wedding day up somewhat. And as with any good romance story, there is that mandated "Happily Ever After" (or HEA, per short label in the trade) for the couple … sorta …kinda, in a dark and different way. But hey, that’s the  way love and weddings shake out sometimes in the real world.

You could also plan your very own zombie-themed wedding, as some have done.


Note it’s  pure coink-e-dink this post came up in time for Halloween.



No matter if at a wedding, or anywhere else, the Zombie Apocalypse, or a smaller, localized, regional variant therein, may sneak up on your ass when you’re least expecting it. That’s why some single dude traveling the world for weddings is always open to the possibilities of stuff happening around him. And you can read all about it and much more in this offbeat, and unique novel. Bob's got you covered if you want something different to read.



Subject: Santiago #30 - Pisco Potation Punch-Up
(Posted on Feb 7, 2015 at 11:21AM ) Tags:
So, Bob finds himself  at a wedding In Santiago just before Christmas 1996, and one of the reception hour beverages being plied is that classic cocktail, the Pisco Sour. It’s pushed proudly as being Chilean in origin, when out of the crowd, some cat jumps out to have a say on that  matter.

“Actually, there is some debate on this matter of the pisco sour and where
it comes from,” said a dark-haired fellow with black-rimmed glasses in a
blue suit beside us. “I don’t mean to curtail your enjoyment, so please excuse
me, but Peru believes it is the originator of the cocktail.”

Antonio Díaz Villamil introduced himself. Bolivian, he lived here in Santiago, and
was a friend of the Glüschitz family. “Both Peru and Chile consider it their national
drink and there are two competing tales of its origin.”

The Peruvian story behind the cocktail was that it was invented in Lima by a
Salt Lake City expat, Victor “Gringo” Morris, in the early 1920s at the bar he
ran called Morris’ Bar. The cocktail was essentially an alternative to the whiskey
sour. The challenging Chilean version of the tale attributed the concoction to an
Englishman, Elliott Stubb, a ship steward  who disembarked at the port of Iquique
in 1872 to open a bar where he supposedly unveiled the drink.

So what’s up with all that, and who’s right? There is some debate between Chile and Peru about the origin of the drink; both countries have their own version and claim ownership rights, it can even be a source of friction between the two nations as explained some more here. Wars have probably been started for less. Another little thing to note and factor into all of this, is that back in 1872, Iquique was actually part of Peru at the time, and after the War of the Pacific in 1879, it became part of Chile. 

The history of the base alcoholic spirit, pisco, dates from 16th century Spain and more details can be found here.
There’s a lot more on the drink’s dueling origins here, as well as some differences in the ingredients and preparation therein. And if limes may not be around on some occasions, folks substitute in lemon instead. Reminds one of that whole gin and tonic lemon versus lime debate which got covered here.

No matter whether you want to make the cocktail the Chilean or Peruvian way, you may also elect to try it a la  Anna Kendrick style. There is deffo some “different” ad-lib recipe action going down.


Unless our gal was confused and thinking salad dressing with the yolk, she was probably just having some fun on porpoise [sic]. Either that or trying to be some pisco sour experimentalist cum crazy cocktail scientist. Go on and get creative with your own version. 
 


Here’s another take on it from our outgoing bubbly bartender cum mixmaster of the moment, courtesy of Tipsy Bartender. Note their tagline philosophy of "Shake it and keep it sexy!"


Note she uses lemons, and says that Pisco is from Peru—but hey, we know it also comes from Chile. Oh well—we’ll let that slide. It's all kinda like the stuff they tell you on the news and getting the real truth on what's going down out there in the world. You gotta go and dig for the real deal yourself from multiple sources, and ones that are out of the mainstream media. 

Bob’s seen a bunch of different variations as regards the ingredient quantities as well, so you may want to fiddle around a bit if you try making this puppy at home. Here are two variations alone. Maybe more booze per serving is better. I mean, it 's not like you ever really typically see a recommended serving size on a bottle label of any spirit out there generally, right? 


On another note, Chile produces WAY more of the base spirit than Peru does, almost 14x according to 2013 figures, but it’s made a little differently. Peru seemingly goes to a little extra trouble to manufacture it in smaller artisanal batches and classify it a little more painstakingly by denomination, quality and strength as well.


There’s even a National Pisco Sour Day in Peru (or Día Nacional del Pisco Sour), held on the first Saturday of February since 2007 per this current Forbes piece, and as this ad below from a few years ago plugs.


Uhhmm, yeah, that happens to be today actually. by pure coink-e-dink. Naturally! One would never time the writing of this post so as to tee up with this annual cocktail celebration. Regardless, it’s a damn good excuse to take down one or two of these puppies.

And just when you think the origin battle was solved, something like this creeps into the mix, and introduces some added doubt and mystery, as seen below, and elaborated on in more detail here and here about the origins going back to at least 1903 in a regional cookbook. 



Despite what the evidence may show, and whichever side you want to pick, Adal Ramones, Mexican television show host and comedian, found some politcal pisco punch here, as linked to the 2009 Chile-Peru espionage scandal:

“What do the Chileans want to spy from Peru?
How to make a good Pisco Sour?” 

Will we ever know the cocltail's real origins?  Maybe not.  And which version is better? It seems many prefer the Peruvian version to its Chilean counterpart.  Best you decide for yourself. This piece navigates the middle ground, basically saying both are different. Our globe-gallavanting guy, Anthony Bourdain, throws out his two cents on the Chilean variant in a 2009 episode (5 - 11 to be exact) from his No Reservations series. Caveat potator, as one may say in Latin.


Back in 1996 at the wedding, a younger Bob was just some happy-camper, single wedding guest, going with the flow, open to learning more about the matter and the country's history, and drinking in the scene. 
 



 
Subject: Santiago #30 - Sipping Something Chilean
(Posted on Feb 25, 2014 at 09:37AM ) Tags:
That reference in the Chile chapter to the three “distant cousins” of the fabled Bubinga sisters, was really a nod to three wine-producing areas/valleys in the country – Aconcagua, Colchagua, and Itata. The Homer Simpson inspired “D.O.” slip (instead of his usual "D'oh"), is the shortie for Denomination of Origin (or Denominación de Origen in Spanish) and was done on porpoise, Corky.

As can be seen from this long and skinny map below, them three female “Bubinga cousins” are on there as proof positive as to what was really going on that day at lunch and thereafter on that Friday the 13th day before the wedding. It was all about consumption, sampling local wares, and exploring the city informally by subway and on foot, which is my favorite way to do things.


The trio of wine valley names were plucked randomly from among all possible there, but I wanted ones that could arguably sound a little more female for extra meaningful context. Back at the time in 1996, Chilean wine was just starting to break out to global export markets in a major way, even though their stuff was all highly drinkable well before that.

Flash forward nearly 18 years to 2014, and Chlle is a wine export monster, which is not the same as a Lady Gaga “Little Monster.”  For those that like numbers, here's a little chart showing Chile in the league of top global exporters by volume (based on 2011 figures).


As a "monster" related sidebar, check out this number "Fatty Boom Boom" by Die Antwoord ("The Answer" in Engrisch), who are out of South Africa, Their video takes the piss out of her "G"-ness. One needs to have a sense of humor on things, but this UK Daily Mail piece from October 2012 seems to indicate she wasn’t too happy about it all. You can judge for yourself on all accounts after watching the video. The group seem to have their own strong opinion on the state of rap too. Ooh ahr.



Okay, so somebody went off track a bit, going on about Chilean wine regions, switching gears to "monsters" (both figuartively and literally), and then to newspaper commentary about "prawns up someone’s privates" and rap in a South African music video, but hey, that’s; the way the world is sometimes, and the news too.

This last country, South Africa, is another great wine exporting nation with good product I can attest to. I haven’t been to a wedding there yet, but maybe one day.

As a single guy, I am always willing to go with the flow, both at home and abroad while on some wedding junket. No stressing about stuff you can’t (or don’t want to) control.

There are otherwise some Santiago shots (and from other parts across Chile)  on this Pinterest board for some added visual distraction.

At the end of the day though, who really be them Bubinga sisterz anyway? Do they actually exist?

That’s something for another time, and wedding quest, plus maybe another deep and meaningful drinks discussion. Remember, it's always better to drink it, than to just know about it.

Subject: Chile #30 - 43-Man Squamish
(Posted on Jan 28, 2014 at 01:41PM ) Tags:
MAD Magazine was a big favorite of mine back when I was a kid, and its sense of humor has a longstanding impression on me to this day, and my writing style. The piece on 43-Man Squamish from MAD #095 (June 1965) was definitely one of the more memorable pieces for me, and you can see it all in gory detail right here as a scanned image from the original issue.  It was that crazy college sport those two kooks George Woodbridge and Tom Koch dreamed up, and it was explained with absolute clarity and brilliance.

By the time you are done processing it all you’ll be an expert on all the positions from Grouches, to Brooders, Wicket Men, Niblings, Frummerts, Over/Underblats, Finks, Leapers and the Dummy. You’ll know how they all mesh together in dizzying formations on the flutney, and how it is all about the Pritz and controlling things with the Frullip.

You’ll know your Snivels and Ogres, and the very important difference between a Woomink and a Durmish, and surprisingly, why imitations of Barry Goldwater (hello Tea Party!) also may play a part in turning the tide of a match, but only if you are a Fink.


Was Draja Druvnik really one of the best at the game, judging by his big endorsement deal back in the day? ida know, and you could probably debate that for hours on end with those in the know. 

The rules of gameplay and interpretation therein are where the action is really at, and if it all makes complete sense to you, then you are ready for a job as a German rocket scientist (even if you haven’t learned that language yet, and only speak Swahili, cuz, clearly you got it all going on upstairs).

If this all sounds too complicated, or you can’t find enough palookaheadz in your college to field a full squad, you can always opt for the much simpler version, 2-Man Squamish, where the object is to lose.

But after all of that, my biggest takeaway from the whole mess was that certain special “wise old Chilean proverb” as immortalized there, and which has haunted me for decades (and maybe still does), until I actually got to Chile for the first time as a single guy on some wedding adventure junket.

It would be überkool to see it played in Squamish, BC, just up the road a bit from Vancouver on the way to Whistler. There’s probably some reason out there somebody can invent for that shared naming kinship between the place and the sport. Maybe Woodbridge and Koch should have added that to the mix.

As I always say to folks traveling that highway, "Don't forget to stop in Squamish." 

Subject: Santiago #30 - Some of those character names
(Posted on Jan 14, 2014 at 10:25PM ) Tags:
One of the buried elements inside that wedding (and indeed generally sprinkled throughout the book) is the use of some past famous or notable people names for some of the local / regional characters in the chapter.

If you are from those places, be it Chile, Bolivia or Germany, some of the names may well mean something to you, and were noticed. Four names were slipped in here for the following characters:


- Anita Lizana (1915 – 1994) was a famous Chilean tennis player who reached World #1 ranking in 1937 when she won the U.S. Championships.



- Ramón Vinay (1911 – 1996) was a Chilean operatic tenor.


- Antonio Díaz Villamil (1897 – 1948) was a Bolivian writer, novelist, historian, and folklorist (not to be confused with florist, although one could be both in an exceptional circumstance). The embedded bio link for this cat is in Spanish. 



- Oswalt Kolle (1928 – 2010) was a German sex educator who first became famous in the 60s and 70s for his books and films on sexuality. Hey, even the groom doesn’t get away clean here.


Just because some single guy is hitting far-flung weddings for fun and adventures, doesn’t mean a few obscure references can’t get thrown in there every now and again. Not that any of the above folks looked at all like the characters present at the wedding. And if they bore more than a passing resemblance to each other, maybe it was all just coink-e-dink.

In keeping with the Chlean wedding backdrop, and discussions harking back to a certain politcal periiod in the country during the reception dinner, here's an inspirational number from 1973 that seems just as suitable today in many places around the world outside of that country. Go figure. Some stuff is timeless. The song title translated to Engreesch, means "the people, united, shall never be defeated." It was also on the music playlist for that chapter, no doubt another coink-e-dink.