funny wedding books novel amazon.com Wedding Chronicles Bob N. Boguslavski
Book Review - Wedding Chronicles

Back cover excerpt:
Life's a wedding for Bobby Bo, who's traveled to nearly 100, from Tenerife to Singapore and Chile to Iceland. He's been best man, groomsman, "father" of the bride, and bridesmaid---but always the single guy, whether with a girlfriend, flying solo, breaking up, meeting a new flame, or witnessing an ex take her vows. A colorful cast of diverse personalities from all rungs of the socioeconomic ladder entangles him in a kaleidoscope of comedic conversations and adventures that unveil the wounds and wonders of the places, cultures, and religions he encounters [...]

*********

Bob N. Boguslavski's Wedding Chronicles, the first in a trilogy, is an enjoyable read about Bobby Bo and his wedding adventures. He's living quite the life, attending various weddings across the universe, mingling with different cultures, interacting with all manners of people, and learning a great deal about marriage.

The book is funny on some aspects. It's told from a male point of view and definitely aimed at the male audience. There were a lot of curse words and quite a lot of 'guy speak', and this, along with the overall language and tone, echos my sentiment that it is essentially the male audience that can fully appreciate the narration as a whole. I did like the structure of the book; the grammar and flow of words were very exact.

Having said that, I felt there were a lot of wasted words in the book. There were several paragraphs full of big, unnecessary phrases that I had to read over in order to fully understand its context. A lot of beating around the bush before getting to a point. It wasn't as straightforward as I hoped it would be.

I wasn't too impressed with the terms the narrator's 'friends' used to refer to their exes, one-night-stands, random encounters, etc, even though they appeared jesty about it. 'Bitch' was quite a common term that was mentioned a lot throughout the book, and even the narrator himself referred to his female encounters as 'chikitas', which isn't at all derogatory, but is somewhat un-pleasing nonetheless.

The main character - the narrator - didn't grow or improve much at the end of the novel, like I thought he should have. He was the same person he was from the beginning, the only thing he gained was more determination to put off marriage for as long as he could, having been to quite a lot of weddings within a 30-year span, and seen how marriage changed the lives of his friends... for the worse.

It is an adventurous travel literature largely for the male audience, and quite informative in the cultural aspects of the various wedding destinations. If you or your spouse are looking for something along this line to read, then Wedding Chronicles is for you.

Enjoy!

OVERALL RATING: 7/10
COARSE LANGUAGE: Very high
VIOLENCE: None
SEXUAL CONTENT: Average


Disclosure of Material Connection: I was given a copy of this book by the author in exchange for an honest review.

Wedding Chronicles on Amazon


Original Posting: Ije Kanu, Literary Fiction Editor | Fall 2015 | Source Link: BellaOnlinesm - The Voice of Women


A couple weeks before Christmas 1996, Bob was sitting in a rather sturdy church in Santiago, Chile, and trying to distract and amuse himself with different musings and thoughts during a tedious, full-on Catholic wedding ceremony. One such thread was about his general attendance, or lack thereof, in houses of worship.

That I needed such diversions at all reminded me why I limited my presence in
religious venues to begin with
--weddings and funerals only. Call it WaFO. I wasn't
even a part of the seasonal C+E crowd. OK, maybe add the odd baptism or bar
mitzvah
or if there might ever be need to stave off hordes of zombies taking
over the world.

Many churches were solid enough for such a siege, but it would be paramount to
hole up in one with minimal windows
high enough up to be inaccessible to marauding
fleshseekers. In Manhattan, the AT&T Long Lines Building was
arguably much more
zombie-proof than most houses of worship. It also held the advantage of not being home
to a
particular religion--unless of course spiritual suffusion itself provided protection.

Not being a regular attendee, Bob was thinking about the fortress-like state of many churches, and comparing to that other edifice mentioned above. And why not? That's the way Bob's brain ticks along. You never know when zombies might strike. Always good to be aware, if not prepared per se.

Here's a frontal of the Iglesia de los Santos Angeles Custodios from the wedding, followed by that NYC structure.


Do zombies even really exist, apart from our fascination with them in movies and TV? Some say there is indeed a basis there, but that is for another discussion altogether. Do your own research and make your own determination.

Regarding picking a suitable spot to make a stand, the downside may well be that if they can't get in, you may consequently not be able to get out either. It goes both ways. Long term survivability is tied to a host of other factors, once you start to think about it. Depending on where one is, and how they are encountered, and with various means and tools haphazardly at one's disposal, any reaction to them will vary, even if it's Grandma, as seen in Scary Movie 4.


The lads in Shaun of the Dead make some exemplary use of old 12-inch vinyl LPs in an inspired creatve moment, in the midst of their off-the-cuff defense tactics.


Bob commends their musical choices, sacrificing some for the sake of others. Do-or-die situations call for tough decisions.

Another facet to consider, is whether the other side will be the more traditional, slow-moving ones, or the newer, more agile fast ones (a la 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later), and how you need to react.


No matter where you are, beyond being holed up somewhere (hopefully) safe and defendable, your ass will need lots of supplies (e.g., guns, ammo, food, water, and other weaponry) in order to keep up the good survival fight.

Here are two highlight reels of improvised, imaginative methods on dealing with and dispatching zombies, doubling down on a Top 10 list approach from some of the cinematic genre's finer splatterfest moments over the years.


Bob particulalry digs the chainsaw bride scene, at position #2 in the second reel, seeing as the damndest things can happen at a wedding, so best to keep ever alert. Here below is the English language trailer on that Spanish flick, [Rec]3: Génesis.


Ladies, talk about being real pissed when your big day doesn't go down the way you had it all perfectly planned. Survival (and marriage) is all about pivoting and adapting.


Now that's spicing up a wedding day somewhat. And as with any good romance story, there is that mandated Happily Ever After" (or HEA, per short label in the trade) for the couple ... sorta ... kinda, in a dark and different way. But hey, that's the way love and weddings shake out sometimes in the real world.

You could also plan your very own zombie-themed wedding, as some have done.


Note it's pure coink-e-dink this post came up in time for Halloween.



No matter if at a wedding, or anywhere else, the Zombie Apocalypse, or a smaller, localized, regional variant therein, may sneak up on your ass when you're least expecting it. That's why some single dude traveling the world for weddings is always open to the possibilities of stuff happening around him. And you can read all about it and much more in this offbeat, and unique novel. Bob's got you covered if you want something different to read.



When Bob was down Mexico way years back and sitting around the pool killing time before a wedding, between arguments with his then girlfriend, he was pondering the following, all the while gandering at her.

She took proud pleasure, whenever asked, in confirming that they were notbolt-on
bazookas. As with car configurations, I tended to agree that OEM, straight
off the
assemblyline, was best, albeit with certain de rigueur manufacturer installed
options.

Adding aftermarket parts denigrated total package value and complicated maintenance
on a long-term basis. Once you started visiting the likes of Manny, Moe, and Jack at
Pep Boys,
it could be hard to stop tweaking and fussing over "improvements" in a
slippery-slope spiral.


Bob draws on this automotive analogy, as applied to people parts, to illustrate his point.

One can do these modifications (mods, for short) well, or ... poorly. You choose. It's all just a little consideration, or not, as the case may be. If you're going to go down this road, pardon the pun, doing things properly is the way to go, whatever your ride may be.


Seeking competent professional help may well be better than a being a passionate, yet probably inept, first-time DIYer. And then, if you decide to press on yourself regardless, with things gone bad, that may breed a future cascade of additional corrective actions, and ongoing issues ever after. Here are a few to consider.


Some of the ones above are definitely a little more creative / artistic than others, making up for any budgetary constraints with sheer chutzpah. But, even if your wallet's thick and you can throw mucho $$$ at the task, getting things done purrfessionally [sic] and all, you still may not get the desired "organic"and "tasteful" end result. But like with many things, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and ultimately, the one with the check book.


Back around the time of the wedding in the mid 90s, the range of going aftermarket with one's body (i.e., plastic surgery), was mostly confined to the aforementioned bolt-on (boobies), nose jobs and other facial plastic surgery. The field actually goes back to ancient civilizations and its earliest methods.


This link has a nice overview for those with a more historical interest in all this.

Sure, there's a bonafide need for this whole area of medical practice, for those that really need it for serious reasons. Where the more amorphous judgment call falls is when folks opt for it, based on insecurity, and low self-esteem. No doubt, a lot of that also has to do with the "ideal" human imagery as constantly portrayed in and perpetrated by the media.

Fast forward a couple of decades from the wedding, and there are a whole range of improved procedures and enhancements that can be had today. Here's a good list from the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery. Try one - try them all, over time. Be the first kid on your tony block to tick them all off the list. It's all gone way deeper and wider now than Charles Dick's classic, A Tale of Two Titties.

Today, it's not just about slicing and dicing, but there are also interesting injectables for those that wish to avail of the miracles of modern medical science to look and feel their youthful best. Some are deemed less invasive than others, and cost less $$$, but still can have some known (and unknown) long-term, undesired results to keep things interesting and with an ever--evolving look.

Bob will let all y'all decide for yourself what looks good, based on a few extreme examples.



And remember, apart from the odd DIYers that took things into their own hands to cut corners and save some do$h, most of these "improved" looks below were done by those who knew the trade, and were well paid for their skills.


If all those follies aren't enough to make one pause a bit on all this, here's a litle more on Monique Allen's cautionary tale to draw upon.


Yikes, after that parade, it makes one think about the risks versus benefits of these aftermarket aesthetic enhancements.

Your ass is much better off plunking down way fewer dollars and dive into a copy of this quixotic, funny, off-the-wall tale about some single guy traveling the world over to exotic weddings.



***** Enjoyed it immensely

Review by Ian Gordon Malcomson| Amazon Hall of Fame / Top 50 Reviewer

Sorry, Bob, for taking so long to read this terrific novel. It does everything I expect in a novel and more:

- one, this explosively quixotic and elaborate tale of globe-trotting Bob Bo's strange compulsion to travel the world in search of weddings to attend has my attention;

- two, while on this global circuit in various capacities, our hero enters into a myriad of conversations about the state of culture, economy, politics, and history;

- and three, each experience contributes to a clearer understanding of what both brings people together and pulls them apart.

Weddings are one of the important social mediums by which ideas are exchanged, issues are hashed over, illusions and fallacies perpetuated, and friendships made and shattered. Might it be said that the convention of a good wedding, with all its rising expectation, glitter, and celebration, imitates life in interesting and cautionary ways: rising hopes, nagging worries, mercurial emotions, intensive views, and creative expressions. I see this book as a clever and fun-loving parody of all that modern weddings have come to mean to the human race.

As Bob Bo has discovered in his global jaunt, weddings are all about the individual needs of the guests and not the matrimonial prospects of the happy couple. To make that point, the author quickly sums up the feelings of the bride and groom in a tersely worded e-mail as a convenient prologue to the main story: the re-enactment of life and all its comic wonders for the umpteenth time.

Rating: 5 / 5 *

Original Posting: Ian Gordon Malcomson | August 31, 2015 | Source Link: Amazon.ca
In 2010 when Bob was getting his first draft of the book together, he put many of the chapters (or weddings) up on Authonomy, for other authors in the community to take a look at and comment on. From several dozen posts up on that website by those on the same creative crusade across multiple genres and styles, here's a fractional selection of opinions and thoughts culled from over a two year period.


"This is so damn funny it's untrue, I had tears streaming down my face, bloody good job I chose to go without mascara today!! If anyone doesn't think this is a good read, send them to me and I'll sort them out for you! " (Jun. '10)
- Mel A. Comley, Impeding Justice [NY Times and USA Today Best Selling Author]

***
"An excellent, funny and engaging piece of work, perfectly described. You really bring a clear picture of your setting to the reader's mind, but it's more than that. You furnish these setting with fabulous characters and stunning humour." (Jun. '10)
- Abi B. Knight (aka Grace Bertram), Relic

***
"You have an original voice, hard to turn away because it rolls along like a freight train. Great imagery, wonderful word usage and punchy dialogue. I love the outline of this, Bobby Bo's adventures and impressions as he hops from wedding to wedding.

One of the fresher voices I've read in a long time. I was at the end of the third chapter before I knew what happened. I found this engaging and interesting. Your prose is excellent ... moves right along with punchy word choice and it's never, never boring. Little bits of wisdom interspersed. Interesting characters. I'm intrigued with the use of music.

In short ... loved this. It's very engaging, very well-written." (Jul. '10 / Jan. '11 combined)

***
"Brilliant!!! Brilliant story, brilliant humour, brilliant structure and absolutely fantastic characterisation. Very, very good read!" (Jul. '10)
- Ian Peter Lavan, Blood and Smierlight

***
"This is hilarious! There is no choice but to back it!" (Jul. '10)
- Amy J. Bates, Love Match

***
"Like a sophisticated rap poem, the words come in a rhythm from some steady source of humorous observations. A celebration of endearing characters, I think even nasty ones would come over as endearing. Loved Baba and wanted to know more of her." (Jul. '10)

***
"Original and very funny. This crosses many genres and should appeal to many as it has huge potential. Well done."(Aug. '10)

***
"It's a cracker! Excellent premise - wish I'd thought of it - and sophisticated writing throughout."(Sep. '10)

***
"Hysterical humor. Worldly wisdom. Fresh. Bold. Original. Endearing characters. Crisp dialogue. Lyrical narrative. Thought-provoking theme. Top notch writing. A captivating read." (Oct. '10)
- Carolina Al (aka Alan Chaput), Savannah Series (Southern suspense)

***
"You've got an easy, almost conversational style, talking to the reader as if we're there with you at one of the weddings. Your Prologue set the scene. We learnt about you, touched upon the subject of marriage (via Lulu's wisdom!) and travel (via sorting boxes for delivery around Canada.) Written down like that, it doesn't sound much, but in your hands it was full of fun and good humour. I can see that you could make anything interesting because you notice small things about people and situations that others usually miss.

Then we begin travelling to the weddings. The characters feel real and the combination of music (revealing a lot about the place, date and the personalities of the couples) the range of countries and the conversations of guests made each wedding very different and memorable. Along the way the narrator's own situation changes. You start as an electrical engineering student but by the end, you're planning a book on weddings.

From the first wedding and the horror of Tanya's sudden interest in marriage, there's important lessons to be learnt. Things like: don't take a girl friend to a wedding and it's best for the nerves if you prepares a speech a little earlier than a few minutes before speech is due. Then of course there's the deeper advice about marriage itself, from the likes of Lulu, Pops, Vijay and Kenneth. Very funny, very engaging and it makes good sense.

Bobby Bo is a great friend and a good listener to a whole range of conversations. There's talk about the economic state of Montreal after the 1976 Olympics, the Iraq war, Turkey's place in the E.U, agriculture, Britain's part in the Middle East situation, the benefit of tattoos, the win-win benefits of hedge fund banking, the global economy and the uncontrollable spending habits of materialistic wives! Plus a good many more diverse subjects, all dealt with in an amusing and entertaining tone that helps us learn more about the characters and also the narrator.

Humorous but wise and ultimately optimistic, this is a lovely book." (Jul. '10)

***
"Excellent and what a romp! Like the male version of Eat, Pray, Love only better." (Jul. '10)
- lizjmm (aka Liz Hoban) The Cheech Room / The Secrets That Save Us

***
"This is my kind of book. Books don't get any better than this. How did I miss it? The title, the pitch and the beginning "This is a work of f(r)iction..." Gave this book six stars ... I wanna buy it." (Jan. '11)
- A. Zoomer (aka Patricia L. Morris), Going Out In Style

***
"Great concept, and wonderfully executed. You're a terrific narrator, and you draw the reader in instantly. I want to go to every single wedding. They're such a novel and quirky way to get to know a culture - or in some cases, how cultures might clash. I loved some of your images - pressed-panini dead animal comes to mind."(Jul. '11)

***
"Oh good, I do love it when a book is so tightly put together and so well written that I don't have anything to offer in the way of constructive criticism.

For me, the best travel writing gives us a sense of place but doesn't get too distracted by that. A country is after all only as interesting as the people you encounter there so the best in travel writing has always been that which produces great character sketches for me. And this certainly has that in abundance. I knew I was in good hands from the very off as I got these great pieces of characterisation of Lulu and the narrator in the first chapter and Baba at the start of the second. Throughout, we meet different characters at the various weddings and they are sketched with equal skill and humour.

Humour is another fantastic aspect here. There are laugh out loud moments throughout. I loved the intros to each chapter, giving us a sense of each wedding before we even got there. It also gives a great sense of continuity throughout. The writing itself is tight and humour packed with great turns of phrase and observations throughout. Excellent, excellent." (Aug. '11)
- RossClark1981, We Are Alive

***
"Wonderfully written and the dialogue is perfect, how clever!! Young, dumb and full of cum! LOL. Brilliant read. Beautifully written and so funny." (Jan. '12)
- Cathy Hardy

***
"The multiple themes which drive this novel make for a very worthwhile read for anyone keen on humour mixed in with poignant biography, and a travelogue that would challenge Alan Whicker for miles traveled supremacy. Most people can point to low points or disasters in their life, but all pales before the trials and tribulations of poor Booby Bo, who seems to attract life's downsides in spite of all the efforts he puts into making his relationships a success. Well crafted and delivered with verve. High stars." (Feb. '12)
- Software (aka Clive Radford), Doghouse Blues

***
"What an interesting book! The pitch doesn't do it justice--most especially in that it fails to relate what I think is your greatest strength, which is your artistry with description and dialog. Highly imaginative use of language, articulate and drily humorous." (Sep. '12)


Alas, it looks like the Authonomy website will be going dark for good come September 30, 2015 as detailed in this piece from The Guardian. That community and forum for authors will soon be no more, but Wedding Chronicles is certainly going to remain available.


Bob certainly valued the platform as a testing ground for what became the completed first novel in this eventual trilogy about some single guy traveling the world for fun and adventure at exotic weddings.


Bob's sorry ass has been to way too many weddings all over the place, spending a ton of dough in the process. At the end of the book, he just wants to try and put some sense to it, together with all the other stuff in life and what's generally going on out there in the big bad world.

Kidding aside, deep down, my relationships have been like all my other life
experiences: they immerse themselves into the mix like new ingredients in
an ever-evolving simmering stew. They are combined with my ongoing exposure
to the world
's ways, my deciphering of what the news media says supposedly
happens out there, friendly advice (sometimes delivered with mixed messages),
and crossed signals, all exerting their collective influence on me.
I am
infiltrated by all, inculcated by none.

So, whaddup with all that?

N.B. That subtle single word above makes all the difference.

At first, when younger and more naive, cuz that's all you are taught and know, you're led to believe that the news is accurate and true, hopefully most of the time, right? I mean, you gotta sorta trust in the system.

Then, slowly, certain telltale things and events transpire in the world on your watch that make you start to question it all. You do some investigating on your own. Dig a bit, and find some good stuff. Dig some more, and a whole mess of things comes to light from a trickle to a torrent to a tsunami. Bob likens this to finally figuring out the real deal on Santa Claus when you were a kid, but on a much larger scale on steroids.

Here are some short clips that may well pique your curiousity on this whole element of the news. It all starts with being open to the possibility that things aren't as they appear, and how you're told things operate. This is certainly NOT the case with many things in this world, and it starts with the mainstream media, which may as well be re-badged as the Ministry of (Dis/Mis)Information.




It's just like that very old, wise, and really deep saying in the restaurant business (that Bob just made up right now actually).

That's not chicken in your chicken chow mein.
What?! You mean it's turkey? The bastards!


And then when/if you do start to suss things out, you'll need to decide whether to take the red pill, or the blue pill.


Then when things really start to change in the world, you'll be in a position to at least not be surprised by it all or already know what's happening, if not necessarily being able to do much about it. Or consider taking neither pill, because no news is also possibly a solution.

All in all, for a break, Bob would rather be at a wedding somewhere exotic having fun as some single cat, and not worrying (too much) about what's (really) going on in the world. I mean, despite what the mainstream news media says (or not), depending how and where you get your information and process it, you still gotta live and enjoy life, right? At least until other bigger, long-planned, behind-the-scenes events manifest, stuff spins out of control, and everything goes to hell in a handbasket thereafter.


In the mean time, just kick back and read this book to take you far far away from the madness and have a few chuckles. Either that, or watch the mainstream news for comedy relief alone, in conjunction with all that finely crafted "reality" television like Keeping Up With The Kajagoogians that is helping us all get smarter about everything.




Subject: Apple iBooks Consumer Review
(Posted on Jul 27, 2015 at 03:06PM )
Tags:
Wow! A fascinating, offbeat, creative, entertaining, commentary

This book is hilarious.

Bob has a unique style. He chronicles his experience at weddings all over the world, including cynical, humorous commentary on culture, politics, gender, food, religion, and just about everything.

It's a travel guide wrapped in a wedding guide wrapped in a comedic rant. His prose is peppered with hilarious Bob-isms. Will he ever settle down? Hopefully not, because we need him to continue cranking this stuff out.

Rating: 5 / 5 *

Original Posting: ToughGuy3 | July 25, 2015 | Source Link: Apple iBooks (US)

This is absolutely hilarious, and a very different book from any other. You won't stop laughing out loud and being surprised by the intelligent and fresh humour throughout. If you're looking for comedic escape delivered with insight into relationships, cultures, and political issues against a global wedding backdrop, this read is a must.

Rating: 5 / 5 *

Original Posting: Jose Garcia | October 25, 2013 | Source Link: Goodreads

Subject: Apple iBooks Consumer Review
(Posted on Jun 26, 2015 at 08:49AM )
Tags:
Brilliant

Laughed out loud and enjoyed every character ... Couldn't stop reading it! It's a must if you like comedy, traveling, journey books.

Rating: 5 / 5 *

Original Posting: Ibero33 | September 13, 2013 | Source Link: Apple iBooks (ES)


A fun and engaging summer read ...

... to which most confirmed bachelors can probably relate. (Although I've long since given up my own bachelorhood, I found myself smiling and nodding in recognition at many of its wry observations.) Each chapter is self-contained so it's the kind of book you can put down for a while then pick up again days or weeks later without having to go back and re-read previous chapters to get caught up again.

Rating: 4 / 5 *

Original Posting: Trevor | June 15, 2015 | Source Link: Amazon.CA