funny wedding books novel amazon.com Wedding Chronicles Bob N. Boguslavski
Subject: Barcelona #62 - Chopsocky cinema and that Ghanaian proverb
(Posted on Jan 31, 2014 at 04:22PM )
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That Ghanaian proverb quoted in the book is a classic that has long vexed Bob since Ananse first told him of it years ago.

"It requires a lot of carefulness to kill the fly that perches on the scrotum."


It opens up a whole line of questioning, and makes one wonder if whoever came up with it meant to believe it applied only against their own set of cohones cum huevos, or someone else's too. Who knows on that? That's why Bob figured one might want to have a more swift and skilled set of hands take a swipe there, if in fact a swipe, slap or short sharp shot of any sort was indeed the optimum strategy here. But Bob ain't here to question the wisdom of that tproverb to begin with.

Ergo the four chopsocky cinema stars thrown out there as a non-exhaustive shortlist of example candidates suitably skilled for the task, but only two could be trying that on their own set.



Lo Lieh had the same birthday as yours truly does too (but he was just a little older is all), Connie Chan Po-chu and Cheng Pei-pei were born six days apart, and as for Bruce Lee, most know about that cat, so his name should have tipped the hand of the other three in the context of the discussion. A lot of flicks were made between all four, but as far as Bob knows, there was never a scene there anywhere involving flies on someone's scrotum. Geez, some of them were into swords and stuff as well, so you can just imagine some other potentially interesting solutions that might come into play with such implements/weapons in such a scenario.

It all reminds Bob of that line from the 1970s TV series, Kung Fu, when Caine is told many a time by his Master that "When you can snatch the pebble from my hand, it will be time for you to leave." It seems Master had the good sense to NOT envision, yet alone allow, multiple learning attempts along the way with flies located strategically somewhere else on his body. But as with many things in life, and after a lot of hard work, training and practice, that "time to leave" eventually comes, and you head off to the next set of challenges.


This Mail & Guardian (South Africa) piece from 2011 touches on a few more proverbs from other countries on that continent that are cut from the same cloth and looks at them a little bit deeper. Whaddup with all that?

All in all, Bob think such psroverbs are best left to thinking about, and not actually attempting them at home alone, or together with friends and family. Some things in life, you don't necessarily need to experience. Maybe you also just don't let flies have much access to the jewels to begin with if you can help it at all. Even when you're some single guy sippin' on cava at a wedding in Spain, you can still reflect on the deeper things in life, in between all the other goings on of the day and night.

Gong Hay Fat Choy or Gong Xi Fa Cai--take your pick.

新年快樂     新年快乐

It appears that this entry and Chinese New Year are just pure coink-e-dink.



Subject: Westport #94 - Subprime made easy for all
(Posted on Jan 29, 2014 at 04:07PM )
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Around the time of that mid September 2007 affair for Bob and Natasha, rumblings were emerging from the financial markets about all that global money crammed inside the US subprime mortgage market that was making financial institutions and hedge funds alike a fortune up until then. It was a massive feeding frenzy, and it was supposedly all bullet-proof safe, paying out high returns, and was endorsed by the brightest minds and leading lights in the industry. Yeah, sure.


Then we all saw what happened thereafter by the fall of 2008 when the crisis hit full on. Bob's chat over a drink with Tristan Alford, then at a purposely anonymous hedge fund, and a former colleague of Bob "The Banker," was tied to this. Tristan knew what was coming down the pike, and had the good sense to want to get out of Dodge while the getting was good to preserve some of his wealth, and keep that Mrs. of his happy with her high-end baubles, haute couture, and gal pal spa getaway weekends with her "Ladies Who Lunch" set, or LaWLu as Bob prefers. A great gig if you can get it!

Since that time, and the subsequent market meltdown, a lot of analysis, debate, and discussion has happened about the whole subprime crisis, and numerous books, TV shows and even movies have covered the topic 25 ways to Sunday.

This great little presentation is still one of Bob's favorites for explaining subprime to just about everybody and their dog in very simple terms. One can well forgive the couple of spelling errors with "traunche" (tranche) and Caymen (Cayman) Islands for the otherwise humorous insight.

This shorter animated piece is a little more serious, but also very good.


These two cats below, Bird and Fortune, also did a bang up job explaining it all with typical British flair and sophistication.


Alas, John Fortune passed away this past New Year's Eve, but he wasn't on the lads' DeathList 2013 roster.

When this single guy is out there hitting weddings all over the place, the topics of conversation aren't always just fluffy and funny. There's real other stuff going on out there that surfaces every now and again and is worth bringing to light.



Subject: Chile #30 - 43-Man Squamish
(Posted on Jan 28, 2014 at 01:41PM )
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MAD Magazine was one of Bob's big favorites back when he was a kid, and its sense of humor has a longstanding impression on him to this day, and his writing style. The piece on 43-Man Squamish from MAD #095 (June 1965) was definitely one of the more memorable pieces for him, and you can see it all in gory detail right here as a scanned image from the original issue. It was that crazy college sport those two kooks George Woodbridge and Tom Koch dreamed up, and it was explained with absolute clarity and brilliance.

By the time you are done processing it all you'll be an expert on all the positions from Grouches, to Brooders, Wicket Men, Niblings, Frummerts, Over/Underblats, Finks, Leapers and the Dummy. You'll know how they all mesh together in dizzying formations on the flutney, and how it is all about the Pritz and controlling things with the Frullip.

You'll know your Snivels and Ogres, and the very important difference between a Woomink and a Durmish, and surprisingly, why imitations of Barry Goldwater (hello Tea Party!) also may play a part in turning the tide of a match, but only if you are a Fink.


Was Draja Druvnik really one of the best at the game, judging by his big endorsement deal back in the day? No idea this side, and you could probably debate that for hours on end with those in the know.

The rules of gameplay and interpretation therein are where the action is really at, and if it all makes complete sense to you, then you are ready for a job as a German rocket scientist (even if you haven't learned that language yet, and only speak Swahili, cuz, clearly you got it all going on upstairs).

If this all sounds too complicated, or you can't find enough palookaheadz in your college to field a full squad, you can always opt for the much simpler version, 2-Man Squamish, where the object is to lose.

But after all of that, Bob's biggest takeaway from the whole mess was that certain special "wise old Chilean proverb" as immortalized there, and which has haunted him for decades (and maybe still does), until he actually got to Chile for the first time as a single guy on some wedding adventure junket.

It would be uberkool to see it played in Squamish, British Columbia, just up the road a bit from Vancouver on the way to Whistler. There's probably some reason out there somebody created that shared naming kinship between the place and the sport. Maybe Woodbridge and Koch should have added that to the mix.

As Bob always says to folks traveling that highway, "Don't forget to stop in Squamish."